Thursday, February 5, 2009

I get so angry at people sometimes

and my mind starts feeling as if I'm trapped in the Bermuda Triangle. I get angry and I grieve when people become petty and take pot shots at others. Sometimes they take pot shots at the less fortunate. Some people find it fun!

It breaks my heart. In our area a man and his wife just lost their baby son. The baby was 3 months old and for some reason he stopped breathing. The mother who was most likely terribly distraught gave the road name but said "street" not "avenue" or maybe it was the other way around. Anyhow 9-1-1 sent the paramedics too the wrong address 30 miles away.

Our area has been inundated with 9-1-1 tragedies recently because of a series of articles in a local newspaper exposing many of the inefficiencies.

Everyone seems emotional and upset. The newspaper has a forum where people post comments and you just wouldn't believe some of the insensitivity displayed.

The father blamed 9-1-1 the day after it happened. I'm sure he was lashing out. Sadly, because his wife was using an inexpensive cell phone, the call wasn't routed appropriately. It wasn't the dispatchers fault and it wasn't the mother's fault. It IMO the fault of the phone companies. They should be stepping up and placing inexpensive GPS systems in all cell phones. But NO! They don't want to do that because...... People will get rid of their landline phones and they'll become obsolete. Why else have a landline?

9-1-1 dispatchers are angry because they feel as if they are under attack.

I want to quote Rodney King and say "Can't we all just get along!"

Don't we all want to save lives?

Other forum issues

I belong to a wonderful on-line community that truly stepped up when my daughter-in-law died. They banded together and raised quite a sum of money for the grandbabies' education. Every single one of them displayed compassion and kindness during the tragedy.

But, I have issues going there anymore. I try to find some joy in it and can't. All the bickering and the pettiness. I wonder.... Was I the same way? Was that how I acted before my daughter-in-law died? Was I that petty and ugly? I guess I was because it's been going on for years.

I hate to say I'm above pettiness now. I'm sure I'm not. But I really don't have time for it. Don't these people realize that there are more important things happening in our world. And that it doesn't mean a hill of beans who's right on an internet forum.

I guess the problem with internet forums is a lot is lost when you can't see the other person's body language. Their nuances and inflections.

I posted in my old blog how wonderful the community is. And it is wonderful. But there are some days you just wouldn't know it.

So, rather than finding enjoyment at this forum that I've belonged to for years, I walk away feeling cold and disgusted.

Again I want to quote Rodney King and say "Can't we all just get along."


I think of all the hurt that people are experiencing all around us. Especially that young family who just lost their newborn son. They are in real true pain. I weep inside for them. I can't imagine how the mom is feeling not giving the right address. It's just tragic.

It truly pisses me off (excuse my language, I've become a potty mouth since my daughter-in-law died) that people can be so petty when there's so much tragedy happening around us.

1 comment:

justher said...

P.L., dear,

I recognize you here..
A few things...

a) You and your family (and sweet Denise) are on my mind much of the time, and I’ve never even met you face to face.

b) No, you were NEVER "like that",

c) But sometimes not to speak out AGAINST, encourages those who are unaware…

d) You are sorely missed!
e) Come back and say “There” what you said here if and when you feel up to it. People need to be reminded what counts,

f) Apple reminded me there already (and it did me a great favor - though I haven't told her yet) .

g) If you didn't notice it, it was in the middle of a recent nit picking thread where everyone was right and yet somehow no one was, you know...?
NOT all the way, not worth the indignation and mean words, anyhow…

h) Apple interjected with obvious pain (paraphrase)

"As someone remembering her mortality more lately..." she wanted to remind us that “nothing is worth hurting some else's feelings".

You know, of course, that Apple is battling breast cancer (If anyone can win against that villain , she’s the one…And at least, she doesn't need the brain surgery, after all. Hooray!)

But still, as she said, in effect - "Ya never know" and now I see you're saying the same thing.

Well, thank you too for the reminder to be our kindest selves, no matter how sure we are that WE’RE IN THE RIGHT...!

She’s said it before this time too, come to think of it!

I sure I hope you back her up when you're ready ( in a nice way, of course. - You always do. If anything, too nicely).

It might soften a few hearts of the "must be rights" or even just "the vastly prefer to be rights" - like, um, me (LOL)

It never hurts to remember how much kindness and compassion help. How often they are sorely needed, aren’t they, P? Yep, even when we don’t see the visible tears being shed, the tears are there in private, just the same.

Those on both “sides.” Those not even involved in that dispute,
Our own. The tears of those we love.
So many with their own inner grief who can’t stand to see MORE of the same, not when we know it’s already way too much!

We all need to be reminded to hold back - as much as we can. Just a little more. Remembering how painful life is , so often….

If only we could give the benefit of the doubt! Hold our tongues. Count to ten. Walk in those other shoes we need to imagine!

How self righteous we can be, can’t we? Well -- I can, I’m afraid….

A wishy washy story - no details, no human interest…But I’ll tell it anyhow....
My brother was wrong, dead wrong. So much, that lives were almost lost on account of his thoughtlessness. Mean-ness, even. And yet -- yet, maybe he didn’t mean it not as cruelly as it came out. Or perhaps he DID mean it, and he is really sick - but too sick to know how sick he is. “He knows not knows what he does.”

Apple helped me hold back my rage ---- somewhat anyhow. (Later, perhaps more). Thank you, Apple.

If you speak up, PL, it might help that much more… There’s so much pain already! Why add to it? I guess some people really get off on that kind of “debate” . Nothing besides our own righteous indignation can seem worth discussing. Indeed, with such deft words, how can the messages be so inept?
(Is it possible everyone can be both right AND wrong at the same time?)
I’m sorry for everyone who is hurting. It IS hard for me to sympathize with the tit for tatters.…But if those whose grief is the clearest (like you) can speak up - mercifully - maybe it will help the rest of us to put things in perspective.

The more the better.